Post Three
Had to follow up to the last one. Since I'm writing this, I say "I" quite often. I should probably use "WE" for the family more. Though many of the thoughts are mine, they are at least some of the thoughts and feelings of the whole family.
I might mix and match I and we. My English teachers would hang their heads in shame. Yes, I know the rules. It's a blog. We will get over it. :-)
Thursday, May 21, 2015
Post two
Could be moving more quickly. Kinda lazy on ppwk, frankly, how much fin is that?
Minor delays and I've been dragging my feet to make sure this doesn't come together too quickly and the house isn't ready or something problematic like that.
I800-A is ready to send off to USCIS (Immigration more or less) Feds give the approval to adopt. In a couple of months we will have it back and we can send the dossier to the Latvian Gov't. By then the goal is to do a quick update to the I800-A and move (or just move and update it after we send the dossier over)
Then the wait for the match comes. I did talk with Victoria from About a Child. The possibility that we would be matched quickly is VERY real. Being willing to accept older and a larger sibling group makes us in demand, as it were. So perhaps by the end of the year we will be traveling to Latvia.
Possible wait of MONTHS in-between the first trip and the 2nd for the court date is also very real. Which stinks. Nothing can be easy. Suppose nothing worthwhile ever is.
I stories in the news of kids neglected and abused. It kills me. Just about overwhelmed with a mixture of sadness and rage. I try and not read them anymore. Our change in family and such seems to make me more sensitive to such things.
So with the paperwork about finished up it is about to get very real in a hurry. Scary as hell. 4 or 5 kids? What if we find a group of 4 kids? Our homestudy isn't approved for that many, so neither will the I800-A. Right group though? Hell yeah. Update the homestudy and I800-A (What's money when its this important?) and dive in, head first.
I really am a lucky man. My wife is wonderful (My wonderful wife Wendy, hur hur hur) Works tirelessly on making sure the home runs like a well oiled machine. Of course its a bumpy ride. Kid s throw fits, stuff breaks, gets dirty etc. That's just life. It always works out.
Kids are amazing. Bright, well-mannered, fun, inquisitive, increasingly independent. Just they way they should be.
Why would we want to upset this perfect little apple cart? Simple, it's because our family does function so well that we want to. There is certainly more love, time and money in our lives. It's all a matter of priorities. Make the time, make whatever we need to have happen, happen.
Sorry post two here is a rambling stream of consciousness. Sue me. :-)
Could be moving more quickly. Kinda lazy on ppwk, frankly, how much fin is that?
Minor delays and I've been dragging my feet to make sure this doesn't come together too quickly and the house isn't ready or something problematic like that.
I800-A is ready to send off to USCIS (Immigration more or less) Feds give the approval to adopt. In a couple of months we will have it back and we can send the dossier to the Latvian Gov't. By then the goal is to do a quick update to the I800-A and move (or just move and update it after we send the dossier over)
Then the wait for the match comes. I did talk with Victoria from About a Child. The possibility that we would be matched quickly is VERY real. Being willing to accept older and a larger sibling group makes us in demand, as it were. So perhaps by the end of the year we will be traveling to Latvia.
Possible wait of MONTHS in-between the first trip and the 2nd for the court date is also very real. Which stinks. Nothing can be easy. Suppose nothing worthwhile ever is.
I stories in the news of kids neglected and abused. It kills me. Just about overwhelmed with a mixture of sadness and rage. I try and not read them anymore. Our change in family and such seems to make me more sensitive to such things.
So with the paperwork about finished up it is about to get very real in a hurry. Scary as hell. 4 or 5 kids? What if we find a group of 4 kids? Our homestudy isn't approved for that many, so neither will the I800-A. Right group though? Hell yeah. Update the homestudy and I800-A (What's money when its this important?) and dive in, head first.
I really am a lucky man. My wife is wonderful (My wonderful wife Wendy, hur hur hur) Works tirelessly on making sure the home runs like a well oiled machine. Of course its a bumpy ride. Kid s throw fits, stuff breaks, gets dirty etc. That's just life. It always works out.
Kids are amazing. Bright, well-mannered, fun, inquisitive, increasingly independent. Just they way they should be.
Why would we want to upset this perfect little apple cart? Simple, it's because our family does function so well that we want to. There is certainly more love, time and money in our lives. It's all a matter of priorities. Make the time, make whatever we need to have happen, happen.
Sorry post two here is a rambling stream of consciousness. Sue me. :-)
Monday, March 23, 2015
Thoughts Day 1
Ok this isn't day one. This is the first post. The story thus far.
I am John Bryant, my wife Wendy and I live in Des Moines Iowa. We considered international adoption previously. The only reason we didn't was because my wife became pregnant with our second child. All this after failed fertility treatments and an in vitro fertilization attempt. That was five years ago.
We have a daughter Jaenelle and a son Jack. We decided we really do want more children. We were a little older when we got married, a little slow on having children (due to my initial reluctance and some fertility issues) now we are in our forties and we decided we want a bigger family. Off to adoption we go.
We've settled on Latvia. International adoption appeals to us due to its permanence that US fostering sometimes lacks. We want to adopt a sibling group and older children. We've done the baby and tot thing with our own. We know that there are children who need parents whose biggest challenges are that they are older (say over 9) and that there are three or more of them. Sure they will have some challenges, we expect it. It just kills me to read some of the backgrounds (Latvia has an excellent site) of some of the sibling groups and see the lack of interest in these groups.
So I decided to keep a blog. I'll make it more public once I get more info in it.
Where we stand...
Homestudy nearly done and the dossier about ready to send off for evaluation. It all will cost a ton of money and time. That's what work is for right? Various grants and tax refunds will pay for this in the end more or less, at least a lot of it. We will probably need to take loans out up front and pay them off over time.
Working on getting our house ready to sell so we can get a bigger one. We need more room for a bigger family.
I know you must think we should have our heads examined. THREE MORE KIDS? Well sure, why the hell not? Lots of reasons? Ok, any good ones? Money is bullshit, we can make money. Time? What else do I have to do but raise kids? The risks? Kids with problems? Everybody has problems. Will these be a big challenge, yup. Do we think we are up to the task? Yup.
To be honest, I know my wife is nervous. Hell, so am I. Who wouldn't be? We should be. That isn't going to stop us, not me anyway.
A whole lot of crappy stuff going on. Work will transfer my job out in 9-18 months (or less) Sell and Buy a house. Adoption and all that time and cost. Mother dying slowly of COPD and possibly cancer. Dog blew out his ACL and needed surgery. Nephew nearly died in a car accident. (He will be ok, lots of physical therapy and some surgery) Whatever. We've been waiting too long for this. We wanted to do it before. I will make this happen through sheer force of will if I have to.
We aren't those types that thank god for everything and believe some higher power is doing nice things for us or we fulfill some calling to do this. We are doing it for the money... right. No, we believe fervently that our kids are good kids. We are pretty good parents and that we can give a strong and loving family to more children.I love being a father. I never thought I would, I do. I can do this for more kids. I can't save the world, but I can help make life better for a few more kids though.
Enough of my mental vomit. Till next time... :-)
I am John Bryant, my wife Wendy and I live in Des Moines Iowa. We considered international adoption previously. The only reason we didn't was because my wife became pregnant with our second child. All this after failed fertility treatments and an in vitro fertilization attempt. That was five years ago.
We have a daughter Jaenelle and a son Jack. We decided we really do want more children. We were a little older when we got married, a little slow on having children (due to my initial reluctance and some fertility issues) now we are in our forties and we decided we want a bigger family. Off to adoption we go.
We've settled on Latvia. International adoption appeals to us due to its permanence that US fostering sometimes lacks. We want to adopt a sibling group and older children. We've done the baby and tot thing with our own. We know that there are children who need parents whose biggest challenges are that they are older (say over 9) and that there are three or more of them. Sure they will have some challenges, we expect it. It just kills me to read some of the backgrounds (Latvia has an excellent site) of some of the sibling groups and see the lack of interest in these groups.
So I decided to keep a blog. I'll make it more public once I get more info in it.
Where we stand...
Homestudy nearly done and the dossier about ready to send off for evaluation. It all will cost a ton of money and time. That's what work is for right? Various grants and tax refunds will pay for this in the end more or less, at least a lot of it. We will probably need to take loans out up front and pay them off over time.
Working on getting our house ready to sell so we can get a bigger one. We need more room for a bigger family.
I know you must think we should have our heads examined. THREE MORE KIDS? Well sure, why the hell not? Lots of reasons? Ok, any good ones? Money is bullshit, we can make money. Time? What else do I have to do but raise kids? The risks? Kids with problems? Everybody has problems. Will these be a big challenge, yup. Do we think we are up to the task? Yup.
To be honest, I know my wife is nervous. Hell, so am I. Who wouldn't be? We should be. That isn't going to stop us, not me anyway.
A whole lot of crappy stuff going on. Work will transfer my job out in 9-18 months (or less) Sell and Buy a house. Adoption and all that time and cost. Mother dying slowly of COPD and possibly cancer. Dog blew out his ACL and needed surgery. Nephew nearly died in a car accident. (He will be ok, lots of physical therapy and some surgery) Whatever. We've been waiting too long for this. We wanted to do it before. I will make this happen through sheer force of will if I have to.
We aren't those types that thank god for everything and believe some higher power is doing nice things for us or we fulfill some calling to do this. We are doing it for the money... right. No, we believe fervently that our kids are good kids. We are pretty good parents and that we can give a strong and loving family to more children.I love being a father. I never thought I would, I do. I can do this for more kids. I can't save the world, but I can help make life better for a few more kids though.
Enough of my mental vomit. Till next time... :-)
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